when someone you know becomes someone you don’t

Adjusting to change is an unfortunate facet of life, especially in a social regard.

I often find myself nostalgic for points in my life where I felt closer and more connected to certain people that I do not have the same (if any) relationship with present day.  The most difficulty comes in regard to the people with whom I simply drifted from.  Not because I did anything wrong or they did anything wrong, but because there just was not enough to keep us tethered to one another.  But anything that diverts from the norm is difficult to get used to, and this makes me want to rectify what I can and reach to what I know.  This is somewhat of a double-edged sword in my life, and my thoughts are harnessed in a repetitive cycle: If there is no reason to not be friends, why aren’t you? If you’re such good friends, why would you have drifted in the first place? But people change and friendships adjust to that: good, bad, or indifferently. And this is not to say you should remain friends with everyone you’ve come into contact with throughout the course of your life or feel compelled to reacquaint yourself with someone just because you’ve recognized that things are different.  But if that’s what you are looking to do, please read on…

The optimistic part of me believes it’s as simple as reaching out to someone to reconnect after losing touch.  A more realistic part of me knows that this is just not feasible.  As time has passed and I’ve continued to live my life, so has the other person. It just isn’t easy to cohesively reunite as if this is not true.

I’ve jotted down a couple questions to meditate on if/when you’re considering reaching out to someone with whom there has been no contact, in hopes of reigniting a friendship.  Take the time to answer the following honestly… Do you miss the actual person or just the idea of them? Is this act motivated by the desire to embrace familiarity? What are the conditions that attributed to distance? How will this time around be different? …and react accordingly.

bridget

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